My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
kristin has been a bad kristin
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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