No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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