do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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