On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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