tell your sister to shave her snatch
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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