I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize