gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
