You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
