There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize