I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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