i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
