I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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