Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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