I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
