just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
