And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize