brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize
