Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
