I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I faked an abortion last night.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
