I think scott just propositioned me for sex
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
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