You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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