I don't think brook has ever known best
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
