im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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