my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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