I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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