kristin has been a bad kristin
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Randomize
