Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
