half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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