I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I AM VODKA MAN
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize