I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I believe in your delicious
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize