He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
