Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
