everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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