i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Randomize
