I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Well I just put wine in my tea
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
