I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
