You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
it was like his penis was on wheels.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
