My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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