Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
