Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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