one might say we're banned from that church
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
