whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
