OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Randomize