My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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