I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
