I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
