The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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