We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
