I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize