What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
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